Life's a BITCH !!

                                    

Alright, I can't sleep right now. Why ? Lots of thing bothering my mind. It's one of the night where my brain just boosted from hibernating into full capacity. So I decided to write it down as I always do. 

Why do I need to face so much crisis ? Alright, I'm not blaming my fate or my surroundings for this, I'm fully aware that I solely responsible for everything. Still, there is one small dot of ink on a blank piece of paper, a dot that makes the perfect imperfections in my ideal blissful life. Till now jealousy fills up my mind, so much jealousy, until I can't even breath sometime. Literally mind breathing I mean HAHAHAHA !

Why just they can enjoy their life, without even one single responsibility beared in their mind nor hand ? Responsibility to study hard or even just shut up and come to class or whatever they suppose to do ? Weird right ? With so much good things, plannings and life ahead planned by someone else perfectly laid down infront that just requires them to walk thru, I just can't stand silently watching them ruin their perfectly good life ! It's true life isn't fair anyway, but this is just way too not right. I'm not anyone to say what's right nor what's wrong, but I guess I did my part right, right ? 

One dot cleared, the ripple of the ink is still be seen. Jealousy again. Jealous of something I guess I should jealous of. There is this guy, who never even appreciate what he have. Again I have no rights to say anything since I do not really know him very well. But come on, you let her hand go just because you scared of someone ? Someone that you not even related with !! Do you really want her, or you just wanna have her for the sake of owning her ? Yeah it's complicated, you can still explain and explain and whatever, but this is just too much.. You expecting so much from her yet you can't even give a simple happiness. Sense of belonging. 

Now there's the uncertainty. Uncertainty of my pityful life ! No matter how much hardwork I put in, there's always this uncertainty. Here comes the catch, these people have confirmation when I don't even have the outline !! Life's a BITCH !! Good night :)